Fear of the Lord.

²⁴ Declare his glory among the nations, 
       his marvelous deeds among all peoples.

 ²⁵ For great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; 
       he is to be feared above all gods.

 ²⁶ For all the gods of the nations are idols, 
       but the LORD made the heavens.

1 Chronicles 16:24-26

Fear the Lord. Daily looking at all of creation, it seems as though it would come natural. I’m beginning to realize how lacking my life has been in following through on this command, that saturates the scriptures. My lack of fear is unjustifiable compared to the infinite power and glory of the one I’m here to serve, and the way He beautifully displays it with each second. I can only ask for His grace in helping me to be broken in humility at His feet. 

On our trip last week, watched a sermon on brokenness, which I feel is the proper response when one fully understands and acts in fear of the Lord. Our pastor handed out a list which compares characteristics of proud, unbroken people with those of broken people. The Lord has really challenged me with it, and has used it to help me evaluate the areas of my life devastatingly lacking of brokenness and humility. I was gonna type it up on here, that was gonna be slightly chaotic. But I was able to find the same list online,  I feel like it’s really worth prayerfully looking over:

“http://infusionchurchdallas.org/Documents/unbroken.vs.broken.pdf”  

 

Edinburg

I spent 6 days of my spring break in Edinburg, TX. The Lord’s on the move, and we were so blessed to be a part of it.

We saw at least 20 people come to know Jesus, and had many many more significant conversations about the Lord. Another team had gone the week before us, and we saw 4 of the college students they witnessed to get baptized while we were there. A guy that those 4 college students shared the gospel with, also got baptized. Those students went to karaoke club, days after becoming christians, shared the gospel and prayed for people. They saw 5 people come to Christ, and 2 people healed. What amazing faith, an incredible savior! 

I was able to help lead a 10 year old girl in a poor neighborhood to Jesus. I stumbled through a spanish tract with her, before I found out she spoke english, the Lord’s funny. She was so excited about her new faith, and it was so exciting to be a part of inviting a new sister into the kingdom.  

One day we went out, in groups, to eat lunch. We were instructed to share the gospel with one person while we were out. Our group of 5 headed to Wendy’s. We got our food, ate and talked and  waited until the last second to choose who we were gonna talk to. Carly noticed that no one was in line and suggested we go talk to the employee behind the counter. The first woman we talked to was pretty closed off when we asked her if there was anything we could pray for her about, but she called the manager over. Estella(the manager) was so receptive and jumped on our invitation for prayer requests immediately sharing with us very difficult things of her life. We told her we were also wanting to tell people about Jesus.  She said she would love to listen, and was really interested but was afraid she would get in trouble at work. We got her contact information, and gave her the church’s information. I was able to call her on a break, talk to her,  pray for her, and then pass her information along to someone at the church. She was so receptive to the gospel. It was so refreshing!! Praise the Lord! The fields are ripe for the harvest. Even in America. 

I am so blessed by the community the Lord’s given me, and how they challenge me in my faith. About a year ago, I realized that while I had been on countless mission trips, been in several dramas, served on leadership for my youth group, and been incredibly involved in church for years, yet,  I had never really shared the gospel with anyone. This truth really disturbed me. Thankfully, this year, the Lord has given me more opportunity than I’m comfortable with to step out in faith and tell people of His glorious name.  Thankfully, the more I step out, the more I realize it’s not me at all, I have no strength, no boldness, no words. This verse really encouraged me this week: 

⁹ I took you from the ends of the earth from its farthest corners I called you. I said, ‘You are my servant’; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. ¹⁰ So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:9-10

Being allowed to be involved in His purposes, is so amazing. When Joseph was in prison and the baker and cup bearer approach him with their dreams. Joseph responds by saying this, “Interpreting dreams is God’s business. Go ahead and tell me your dreams” (Genesis 40:8) It really struck me to want to have that attitude about the Lord’s purposes. What’s His business, should be my business too.

Last week the Lord allowed me to be a part of His purposes in Edinburg. What an incredible blessing! May the Lord continue to open my eyes, and your’s to what He’s doing, here. now. In: the nations, the US, Texas, Belton, UMHB. He’s so worth, whatever the cost may be.

The Cross.

Today, I hurt my hand. I was getting dressed, and I threw my hand out real quick and wacked it on the corner of my open drawer. It hurt. I looked at it, it wasn’t bleeding hardly at all but I definitely got a little gash smack dab in the middle of my hand. Within seconds of hitting it, I started feeling incredibly nauseous and lightheaded, I wandered out of my closet to sit on the side of the bathtub. My body felt extremely hot, then I started sweating like crazy and my arms and legs felt really cold, and my breaths were more labored. Everything felt kinda slow motion. I was certain I was about to either throw up everywhere or pass out, or both, so I called my roommate in to the bathroom. After a few minutes of sitting and drinking some water I started to feel normal again, so I got back up and got ready for the day. My hand still hurts a little bit, but it’s mainly just an inconvenient place to get injured. I was really weirded out by how my body responded, so I asked my nursing professor. She said that it sounded like my body went into fight-or-flight mode as soon as I hit the nerve in my palm. Fight-or-flight, how wonderful that our bodies can respond to danger, but my goodness was it a miserable feeling. I felt awful. Don’t worry, there is a purpose to me telling you this story, I’ll get back to it.

The Lord has been teaching me alot about the depths of my pride and the definite need for humility. I’ve been reading this book called, Humility(go figure) by CJ Mahaney. Something in the section I read today really stuck out to me. He was talking about daily disciplines that help him walk out in humility. And he quoted John Stott as saying,  “Everytime we look at the cross Christ seems to be saying to us, ‘I am here because of you. It is your sin I am bearing, your curse I am suffering, your debt I am paying, your death I am dying.’ Nothing in history or in the universe cuts us down to size like the cross. All of us have inflated views of ourselves, especialy in self-righteousness, until we have visted a place called Calvary. It is there, at the foot of the cross, that we shrink to our true size.” This really caused me to think of the cross for what it actually was. The only man in history who knew no sin, and loved in a way we can hardly imagine, suffered one of the cruelest and most brutal deaths imaginable because of me. My mistakes. My disobedience. My pride. My unholiness. My unworthiness. As I thought on this and pondered the reality of His sacrifice I thought about the cut on my palm, right where a nail went into His. I thought of the misery of having my body respond to that nerve being hit this morning, and was overwhelmed with how much more violently it must have responded to a nail being driven through it. The torment and pain Christ suffered, so I may walk in the freedom I all too often toss aside for this world’s captivity, is really unimaginable. Tonight I am shrinking to my true size, at the foot of his rugged cross, and somehow He’s looks at me and says, “it was all worth it.”  Amazing.

Now

Just a few of the abundant new and exciting statistics:

Iran:

1980: 100 known believers

2009: 10 million known believers in a land where persecution is heavy.

Afghanistan:

There are as many people coming to Christ in 1 month, as they used to see in 10 years.

China:

Formerly one of the most closed and unreached people has become one of the world’s strongest, fastest growing church planting movements, and they meet predominantly underground.

India:

In an area once known as the “graveyard of missions” it had been 100 years since workers had seen anyone come to Christ, is just recently a church planting movement of 300,000 and growing.

 

If this doesn’t make you want to jump on a plane and get in on what God’s doing in the nations, you must be crazy.

“Do you not say, ‘Four months more and then the harvest’? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest.” John 4:35

 ”When he saw the crowds, He had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. 37 Then He said to his disciples, ”The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few;38 therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to“ send out laborers into his harvest.” Matthew 9:36-38

They’re hungry. He’s moving. Let’s go.

kingdom treasure

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.”

Jim Elliot

no turning back.

I was reading an online commentary on Luke 9:62: “But Jesus told him, ‘Anyone who puts a hand to the plow and then looks back is not fit for the Kingdom of God.”

This quote was stated  within the commentary and I thought it was something worth pondering:

“He who is unwilling to sacrifice everything for the cause of God is really willing to sacrifice nothing.”

2008.

2008. Words can hardly describe what the past year has been.

I have learned more, and grown more than I ever have in such a short period of time.  I have cried more tears, had more sleepless nights, felt more lonely, heartbroken,  and desperate than ever before. I have experienced a deeper level of community, spent more time on my knees, cried out to the Lord, trusted Him in a much deeper way than ever before. I’ve learned of His incredible sovereignty no matter what. He revealed to me how selfish, and prideful I can be, and how often I play the victim, the Lord humbled me. I discovered that for the most part my treasure was not in Heaven but here, and the Lord transformed my heart. I found out, that no one can fully satisfy me, but my Savior, Jesus. I felt more weak, physically, spiritually, and emotionally, and found the sustaining beauty of His strength. I’ve had to learn what true integrity looks like. I’ve found that I can be more disciplined and accomplish more than I think I can. Every plan I’ve made has been thrown out the window, and instead of the chaos I imagined, God has given me overwhelming peace. I have no idea what tomorrow looks like, and I’m almost completely okay with that.  The Father gave me His heart for the nations, and the lost. I had never before been so broken by the idea that there were people living in bondage who had never heard that He’s already freed them. Heaven and hell became realities to me. I’ve experienced deep homesickness for heaven more than ever before. He taught me that anger is never justified. Grace is mandatory. How to love people that are so hard to love. I appreciate my parents in a new profound way.  I went to Africa to feel less called there than ever before, and learn more than I’ve ever learned in 5 1/2 weeks. I gained a heart for muslims and the middle east. Trashed alot of my worldly desires for heavenly ones, by His grace. I have been reminded that He always sees and always knows. I will never be disappointed in what His will is for my life. I have been more challenged to live as Christ, in everything, words, thoughts and actions, making much of my King no matter what is going on in my life. I finally understood bringing Him glory has to be my ultimate goal.  Jesus is the only one who will never disappoint me.

In 2008, I met Jesus in a way I never have. Without a doubt this year has been the hardest, most challenging, most painful and stretching year in my life. But I could easily say it’s probably been the sweetest, most beautiful time in my life. The Father refined me in a way I will never fully be able to describe or understand. Hallelujah for 2008. Thank you Jesus. 

Bring it on 2009. You’ve got some stiff competition.

worship music suggestion

I just found a new worship cd series that I thoroughly enjoy, and I thought I’d share it. They’re very simple and beautiful

If anyone’s heard of the Enter the Worship Circle Cds, the same people started making a new series of cds called Chair and Microphone. There are 3 volumes.

You can listen to  a few of the songs from them on myspace:  Volume 2(more of a male vocalist) www.myspace.com/aaronstrumpel (only a few of the songs on his page are from that cd, the others are from one of the normal ETWC cds) & volume  3(more female vocalist) www.myspace.com/entertheworshipcircle

Enjoy!

focus.

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus.

Look full in His wonderful face.

And the things of life will grow strangely dim.

In light of His glory and grace.”

 

I was praying and worshipping as I drove home yesterday, and this verse stuck out to me more than it normally does. What a simple and refreshing reminder. This world and this life is nothing compared with the vastness of who He is. This break I’m going to strive to keep the focus of my heart and my thoughts on Christ. In doing so, I am asking Him for an overwhelming revelation of His glory, grace, and presence. I am asking Him that His presence would over take my heart and mind. May the places in my heart now filled with grief, hurt, fear, worry, uncertainty, and confusion be replaced with the resounding sound of wholehearted worship. 

Lord, make the things of this life grow dim, and make the things of you be magnified. Take my feeble heart and mind. Make me a wellspring of praise. Only you are worth it.

time for a break.

I feel indifferent about Christmas break…kinda.

I’m ready to not do school for a while, spend time with my family and close friends from home. But another part of me doesn’t want to leave. It’s so interesting how this place, which 2 1/2 years ago was so foreign, is now, so familiar. Some of the best memories, and hardest days have been here, and some of my dearest friends are here. What a blessing! Who would have thought, 2 1/2 years ago, that I wouldn’t be racing home after I finished my last final, but actually lingering here, for no reason other than to be here, and to be with some of the people I love most. The Lord is so good and faithful to provide. 

But I will attempt to savor this season of Christmas break, and squeeze all I can out of it.

My Christmas(break) list:

-Do several puzzles with my family.

-Go running around town lake, lots. And actually begin training for the half marathon.

-Worship and pray with my girls.

-Twirl around under the tree of lights in Zilker park till I fall on the ground.

-Cuddle, play, and spend time with my babies: Blythe, Fiona, and Noah.

-Catch up with old friends over food(or ice cream)

-Help my sister, Brit, successfully eat at every Austin-y restaurant on her list while she’s visiting.

-Family game nights

-Successfully get gifts for the whole family.(keyword: successfully)

-Watch movies.

-Go bike riding.

-Spend alot of time with Jesus, in alot of beautiful places outside.

-Go stargazing with a friend.

-Deep conversations.

-Break in a new journal.

-Attend my grandma’s annual Christmas eve party.

-Sit around in PJs all day… 

-Write thank you notes.

-Visit Maypearl, and spend time exploring all it has to offer with miss melanie.

-Possible early morning garage sales with E and Hil.

-Give Heather noogies…and spend alot of time making her hang out with me.

-Give  and Get hugs from my daddy.

-Give my mama foot massages

-Sing ALOT of christmas songs.

-Prove to my family once and for all that I really am terrible at tennis.

-Play piano, and relearn an old song or two.

-Go on night time runs with my mom and Jen to look at christmas lights.

-Make homemade christmas cookies.

-Walk in freedom.

-Love people.

-Experience holy peace.

-Pray.

-Surrender.

-Reflect.

-Rest. 

I think that’ll keep me busy…